Strains of Real VS Fictional Life

     So the last 6 weeks (at least I think it has been 6 weeks) has been very draining. In real life, and in the fictional one I'm trying to fix. 

     Real Life: On top of my own life getting me down, my best friends (who are basically sisters to me) have had some tough times. One of my girls, her pregnancy isn't going so well. So right now there's lots of tests and up-in-air who-knows-what-is-going-to-happen stuff. Others has suffered bereavements, family members diagnosed with illnesses. It's tough. Unfortunately it's the result of real life and growing older. We all understand how crap things like this feel. We all have individual ways of dealing with these things. And we have to, because there's no way to be sheltered from any of it.

     Fictional One: There's this story, and characters that I don't think I can ever give up until I've got there story nailed. Told it in the way that they most deserve. But - do you believe there is ever a point that we must say: enough is enough? Fellow writers can understand this feeling of course, however I've always believed: never give up. And I don't think I can, not yet. I've at least got to go over all possibilities. It's worth trying, and I think these characters deserve that from me.

     So, all in all these weeks have been pretty emotional. And if you know me, you know I'm a pretty emotional person (in private of course, at home - typically British of me.) I cry at ONE BORN EVERY MINUTE, LONG LOST FAMILY and DON'T TELL THE BRIDE. (I once told a friend I cry because these three programmes are full of love. I can't handle all that love.)

     Like many I also cry at films, happy ones and sad ones. Mainly sad ones. My mum moans about how many sad films I watch. Recently I watched a beautiful film called: BRIGHT STAR. It tells the tragic love story of John Keats and Fanny Brawne. The thing that makes this film so much sadder, much like the film CREATION about Charles Darwin, is that the story is based on truth. Fact. I sob harder when I remember this.

     Once my eyes were dry, in true form I borrowed the book from the library. The book is a collection of the letters, and poetry, of John Keats. I needed this book because there's one letter that the delectable Ben Whishaw narrates in the film, and it melts my heart. I wanted to share a few lines from it with you:

'write the softest words and kiss them that I may at least touch my lips where yours have been. For myself I know not how to express my devotion to so fair a form: I want a brighter word than bright, a fairer word than fair. I almost wish we were butterflies and liv'd but three summer days – three such days with you I could fill with more delight than fifty common years could ever contain.'

     If someone ever uttered these words to me, I'd be there's always.

Why?

Today I meant to post a blog answering some questions tagged for me by fellow bloggers, but I really wanted to share this conversation I had. I shall post my original blog for today in a couple of days time.

Random: Why do you like fantasy so much?

Me: (Raises eyebrow) Why not?

Random: Seriously, why?

Me: Because...because it's exciting, and it's beautiful.

Random: But reality is exciting and beautiful.

Me: And I know that, I can see that everyday if I look hard enough. Just pop onto Google and look at the amazing stories and pictures people share. But in fantasy, all impossible things are possible. Nothing is unimaginable.

Random: Ahh...I see. Fair enough.

A little snippet of my life at university. Hope everyone is having a great start to March. One last thing before I finish, I wanted to show anyone who hadn't seen this a picture that Jo on Once Upon a Bookcase shared, and I think it is just brilliant.

:)

Storytellers & Dreams

A theme I've seen floating around the blogsophere of late is, why do we write? What drives us?
And it got me to thinking.

I've always written since I was small. My Dad was a great storyteller, and he was once close to having his own children's books published, but unfortunately his illness got worse and everything sort of fell through.
Although he never lost his passion.
When I hit my teenage years he would bend the ears of my nieces and nephews, and they loved it just at the same as I did.
(I was an aunt quite young, my first niece was born when I was 7 - it is the result of being the youngest of 8 siblings.)

So I guess my Dad is a quite a big driving force for me. When I was about 10 I had a piece of homework that was to write a summary of a story we had been told in class. And since we weren't given a specific length to abide by, I wrote the longest, 13 pages! Which was like me writing a novel in comparison to my classmates.
I remember my teacher (who I adored) telling my Dad that she stopped marking half way through because she was so engrossed and astounded. My Dad smiled and said, well she does like to ramble on.

Then I sorta got distracted from writing, well actually I didn't.
I was always writing snippets of stories and fan fictions through my teens. However it was always a back burner while I went out with my new 'cool' friends (who have stayed my closest friends since - best in fact) and dived into my time at college where I studied theatre.
My whole live seemed to be more or less devoted to those two things.
(And writing was always the hobby that didn't cost me much, except the price of pen and paper, and since money has always been tough it seemed like the best pastime when I couldn't afford to go out.)

Then a week after I turned 18, my Dad sadly passed away. And even though he had been ill most of my life, it was a tremendous shock when he departed.
Even now some days are harder than others.
I was a bit lost for a while, trapped somewhere with only my grief and mind for company. Those were some dark days.

One day I got to writing a story about a young girl who loses her Dad, and she meets a guy who she begins to fall for, but it turns out he has a big secret. Bigger than anything she could ever imagine.
And needless to say that story became free counselling sessions for me.
I do still one day to hope to share it with others when I finally finish it.

That story also gave me something else, it made me realise how much I love writing, and why hadn't I thought about doing something with it before?
It opened my mind, my imagination to stories I didn't even know I had in me. I found the fantastical tales I had always longed to write, but never thought myself capable.
And I've been writing everyday, with a passion, ever since.

It also helped strengthen the relationship with my Mum, because of those words we both understood the pain we were sharing, without the need to say it out loud.
Now she is my first reader, greatest critic, and the person who encourages me each and every day to follow my dreams.
One day I hope to help her achieve hers.

Then I embarked on learning more about becoming a professional writer, the world of agents and publishing.

And as much as I long to see my words in print, want others to read about the worlds and characters I've created, I will never lose the love and inner peace writing has given me.

There will always be work, mainly my poems, that I will keep for myself because they mean so much to me, but there is so much more of me I want to give and share with others.

Is there a reason you write? What keeps you going?

Romantic Fools

I am a huge fan of romance, be it depicted in a book, TV show, film or ballad. I love to witness two people fall in love, adore it when they make me laugh and like it even more when they make me cry.

On Friday I went to watch One Day, and I am yet to read the book, but I plan to do very soon. I know there's been some criticism over the film, and concerning Anne Hathaway’s accent I'd have to agree (which hurts me to say because I love her) however overall

the film was beautiful, the supporting cast was fantastic, and I left the cinema with the urge to still cry. So after falling in love with Jim Sturgess, and the film, I thought I'd share some of my favourite (and not so favourite) films whose main ingredient is love.

My absolute epitome of a romance probably would have to be 'Becoming Jane'. (And it's not just because it stars the most wonderful James McAvoy).

It has such a tragic, yet beautiful love story. Not mention a brilliant supporting cast. There are so many lines from it that I could quote that make me feel a hundred things at once. It is one of those stories that I had to share with my friends, and make them suffer by spending twenty minutes crying with me.

One of my favourite screenwriters, for writing romance fuelled with laughter, is Richard Curtis. Not only is he the man behind Vicar of Dibley (seriously I could quote whole scenes) my joint favourite TV show, tied with Doctor Who, but he is also the force for some of the most popular romantic comedies.
Nothing Hill has to be a classic, and everyone loves a young, typically English Hugh Grant. It brings together two polar opposites, and shows how easy common ground can be found to form a strong friendship and love. It also has a stellar supporting cast; I am a big fan of the ensemble who makes a film.
And then of course there's Love Actually (do I even need to mention the cast in that?). I love films that interlink the lives of many characters, it makes you feel as though, yes this is the real world. (I also am a fan of Valentines Day, He's Just Not That Into You and am looking forward to the upcoming New Years Eve)
Richard Curtis is a man who makes heart-warming, belly laughing funny, tender films and TV shows that you want to watch again and again.

I really enjoy watching films containing the wickedly talented Sandra Bullock. I will admit that Blind Side has to be some of her best work, but I have to love Miss Congeniality, The Proposal, While You Were Sleeping, Two Weeks Notice (which happened to be my Dad's favourite chick flick). She has this vulnerability about her, and has brilliant comic timing that no one can dispute. She makes those films that you love to watch because she makes you laugh, and is so endearing that it lights up your screen.

I also have to mention the many period romances I love. The Young Victoria stars the superbly talented Emily Blunt, and is about my favourite royal couple (although Wills and Kate may be challenging that). It is a stunning film that I love to watch over and over again.
The Duchess is one of those films that took me some time to watch, I couldn't sleep one night and decided that it was a good time to play it. It had me wide-awake, sobbing into my pillow. Plus it has the delectable Dominic Cooper as one of it's stars. What a man.
I love adaptations of Austen and Bronte novels; I try to watch as many versions as I can. I love the Mansfield Park with Billie Piper, perhaps just for that adorable scene at the end. I do have to favour the Pride and Prejudice starring Keria Knightly. For one main reason, the man who the voice who makes me swoon, Matthew Macfadyen. I love it when the M&S adverts come on my television.
I also really like the Emma versions with Kate Beckinsale, and Romola Garai. Jane Eyre with Ruth Wilson and Toby Stephens, also really really excited about the latest version with Mia Wasikowska and Michael Fassbender.
And I have to mention the Tess of the D'Urbervilles with Gemma Arterton. I know it’s not a film, but it's bloody fantastic. (I watched this for free on youtube before buying the DVD, so go find it.)

I can't finish without mentioning the absolutely divine, break my heart but make me want to do it again, Shakespeare In Love.
During my first viewing of this, it was interrupted by my sister and brother walking in drunk. To say I was not amused would be an understatement.
This came out during the start of my love for William Shakespeare. It is beyond any other words I have.
And I am going to do it one more time, the cast!!! The film is silled with some of the greatest actors the world has to offer. And Geoffrey Rush is one of the finest, just look as his catalouge.
This was my Becoming Jane, before I knew James McAvoy and watched him as Tom LeFroy. This is one of my romantic classics.

Now I would discuss romance in animation films, i.e. Disney etc, but you will be here all night (and plus I have planned blog about my love for animation films).
Also while writing this I did think about the many wonderful books I have read containing romance, and let's face it-that's pretty much all books I read) so tomorrow I will have a blog devoted to romance in books.

Aww love, look at what you do to me.